A common suggestion to temper conflict is to walk away, giving everyone time and space to calm down. However, care should be taken when applying this to conflict with loved ones. “Walking away” does not necessarily mean suddenly halting an argument and turning your back on someone. Abrupt physical disengagement has emotional consequences. It harms [...]
Archive for the ‘Lessons From Divorce’ Category
The Powerful Effect Of Disengagement
Posted in Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, tagged Argument, Communication, Friends, Happiness, Health, Love, Mental Health, Relationships on 2012/03/02 | 1 Comment »
If You Care, Don’t Leave Everything To An Attorney
Posted in Finances, Getting Ahead, Lessons From Divorce, tagged Friends, Law, Lawsuit, Legal Matters, Life, Perspective, Politics on 2011/12/03 | Leave a Comment »
If you’re struggling through a legal matter in which you are emotionally involved, ask a friend to objectively evaluate the situation. An objective third-party that walks through the facts and reads all related materials can keep the situation in perspective, ensuring all critical issues are captured. This will be especially handy if you have an [...]
Posted in Dating, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, Things Better Off Said, tagged Breakup, Children & Family, Death, Divorce, Love, Relationship on 2011/11/21 | Leave a Comment »
Relationships don’t last forever and people don’t live forever. It’s important to keep socially active so that a person is not left hanging, trying to develop new relationships and strengthen old, later in life.
Being A Jerk To Others Might Hurt The Ones You Love
Posted in Family Enrichment, Getting Ahead, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, tagged Behavior, Business, Communication, Ethics, Etiquette, Getting Ahead, Jobs, Perspective, Professional Networking, Relationship on 2011/09/01 | Leave a Comment »
If you’re not usually a jerk but you’re thinking about being an extreme jerk for whatever reason, take a couple of seconds to consider what impact your action(s) might have on those you care about, such as your spouse. People who’ve been with you for a while are with you because they know you are [...]
Don’t Let The Break-Up Break You
Posted in Dating, Family Enrichment, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, tagged Blame, Break-Up, Breakup, Children & Family, Dating, Divorce, Happiness, Life, Love, Marriage, Partner, Pleasure, Relationship, Romance, Separation, Split, Spouse on 2011/05/04 | 2 Comments »
It takes two to maintain a relationship, only one to break it. Sometimes a person’s leaving has nothing to do with you. Sometimes there’s nothing more you can do. Blaming yourself under these circumstances not only gets you nowhere, it takes you nowhere.
Adapting To Love
Posted in Family Enrichment, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, Psychology, tagged Divorce, Happiness, Life, Love, Marriage, Partner, Pleasure, Romance, Spouse on 2011/05/03 | 3 Comments »
Some say we must accept how and who our loved ones are when entering a marriage because no one changes in a marriage. In fact, it’s the opposite. We must adapt in order for our marriages to be successful. If we are capable of change, so are our partners.
Are Your Children Forced To Relive Your Divorce Regularly?
Posted in Education, Family Enrichment, Lessons From Divorce, tagged Behavior, Children, Children & Family, Divorce, Education, Enrichment, Ex, Happiness, Health, Homework, Kids, Life, Love, Partner, Perspective, Problem Solving, Relationship, Relationships, Results, School, Solutions, Spouse, Tutor on 2011/04/21 | Leave a Comment »
Feel like your ex is taking out frustration over the divorce on your children? There are several ways in which you can alleviate the pressure on your children. For example, as mentioned in an earlier post, you can modify your affect to influence your children’s response to a situation. Another way is through problem solving: [...]
To Whom Should I Cleave?
Posted in Family Enrichment, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, Psychology, Spirituality, tagged Argument, Aunts, Behavior, Children, Children & Family, Communication, Cousins, Divorce, Enrichment, Genesis 2:24, Grandparents, Happiness, Health, Life, Love, Parents, Perspective, Relationship, Separation, Strife on 2011/04/20 | Leave a Comment »
When parents have children, they have an important decision to make. With children, the parents created a new family. The parents must then decide which to prioritize more – the families into which the parents were born, or the family the parents created. This is a genuine decision as, rather than being objective, some parents [...]
Working Magic On Children Hurt During Divorce
Posted in Family Enrichment, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, Psychology, tagged Behavior, Child, Children, Children & Family, Communication, Conflict, Disappointment, Divorce, Enrichment, Ex, Happiness, Health, Life, Loss, Love, Magic, Outlook, Partner, Perception, Perspective, Relationship, Separation, Spouse on 2011/04/17 | 3 Comments »
If you’re committed to putting your children first, understand your ability to affect the feelings of your children in a divorce or separation. It’s inevitable that the actions of a parent or family member might disappoint your child – such as by not showing up to a child’s event, responding poorly to demands on the [...]
Posted in Dating, Lessons From Divorce, Personal Enrichment, tagged Attraction, Axiom, Dating, Friends, Friendship, Happiness, Love, Marriage, Matchmaker, Pleasure on 2011/02/28 | Leave a Comment »
Old matchmaker’s axiom: To ensure a lifetime of happiness and satisfaction, marry a person that loves you more than you do him.
Succumbing To The Burning Rage In Divorce – A Consequence
Posted in Lessons From Divorce, tagged Angela Bassett, Anger, Arson, Assets, Bernadine Harris, Divorce, Fire, Rage, Relationship, Terry McMillan, Waiting to Exhale on 2011/02/18 | Leave a Comment »
Remember the very satisfying scene in Waiting to Exhale in which Bernadine Harris (played by Angela Bassett) piles her husband’s belongings into his car and then sets his car and belongings on fire? Even though you might be tempted to do the same, consider this: besides getting you in trouble, destroying your spouse’s things during a divorce also [...]
In The End, Which Regret Would You Prefer To Accumulate?
Posted in Family Enrichment, Improving Relationships, Lessons From Divorce, Personal Enrichment, Things Better Off Said, tagged Accumulation, Age, Cheer, Children & Family, Enrichment, Friends, Friendship, Fulfilled Life, Fulfillment, Happiness, Health, Holidays, Hope, Intent, Life, Love, New Year, Pleasure, Regrets, Relationship, Unfulfilled, Unfulfilled Life, Youth on 2010/12/31 | Leave a Comment »
Accumulating regrets is inevitable. When the hope and intent was not to hurt anyone, regrets about what you have done suggest you have lived a good life. Regrets of things you have not done suggest an unfulfilled life. In the end, which type of regret would you prefer to accumulate? May you find wonder and reward in each [...]
Posted in Hiring Decisions, Lessons From Divorce, Manage Successfully, Psychology, tagged Breaking Patterns, Coincidence, Deliberate, Lessons Learned, Pattern, Perspective, Psychology, Relationship, Successful Management on 2010/12/28 | Leave a Comment »
The difference between coincidental and deliberate is a pattern.
Tool For Making Consequential Decisions
Posted in Business, Dating, Family Enrichment, Finances, Getting Ahead, House Matters, Improving Relationships, Job Search, Lessons From Divorce, Manage Successfully, Personal Enrichment, Resignation Tips, tagged Decision Making, Decisions, Goals, Guidance, Life, Making Decisions, Priorities, Problem Solving, Resign, Resignation, Successful Management, What to do? on 2010/09/24 | Leave a Comment »
Trying to make a big decision, such as leaving a job or buying a house? The following steps might aid in making the decision. Identify your goals and priorities. To the extent possible, establish measurements for these two items. Identify why you want to make the decision. What are the differences achieved by the decision? [...]
“Friends” Don’t Make Friends Take Sides
Posted in Lessons From Divorce on 2010/07/10 | Leave a Comment »
You and your spouse most likely share friends. Do not involve your friends in the divorce, nor force them to take sides. Involving friends is a sure way to lose friendships, whereas your friends will respect you for not involving them.
Don’t Involve Your Children!
Posted in Lessons From Divorce on 2010/07/10 | Leave a Comment »
Don’t involve your children in divorce proceedings. There’s a good chance your children will grow to resent you for your interference in their relationship with another parent or other loved ones.
